There are certain things that drive girls wild. Dance beats. Comic books. Watching Fox News. Yup, girls are strange creatures. But us men, we are quite unintelligent and will do anything to sleep with women. After all, women basically get to decide who sleeps with who. Unless their hookers. To help you out men, I've organized a comprehensive guide that can tell you if you are being played or what. Here's 25 Things That Are Better Drunk
1. Boobs.
2. Watching Sports. But Not Women's Sports, Those aren't Sports.
3. Taking a Test and Know That You're Failing It While Taking It.
4. Bragging to Your D.D. about How Awesome the Night Was on the Ride Home.
5. Being "that" jackass and yelling "Freebird!" at any concert ever.
6. Painting over the "s" and "d" in the word speed on a speed limit sign.
7. Sex. Obviously, did you really think I was going to leave this off?
8. Family Parties.
9. Going to a baseball game and standing up every time there's a pop up because you're that guy who thinks it could be a home run.
10. Getting out of a speeding ticket.
11. Posting on your grandma's Facebook wall.
12. Getting kicked out of Applebee's for peeing in your water so you "didn't have to pay for lemonade."
13. Telling 6-Years Old the Tooth Fair is "Just a Bunch of Horsecrap--like The fucking Eagles."
14. Showing Up Anywhere Naked.
15. Getting lost and asking a homeless guy for a ride.
16. Chugging the Communion wine at church.
17. Tackling (or Being) a Mall Santa/Easter Bunny.
18. Sending out a mass text to everyone in your phone book that just says "fuck you" and seeing what happens.
19. Screaming the last word of everyone sentences and saying "whooooooo!!!!" after that word.
20. Ask a girl what kind of drink she wants, then take it from the bartender and start drinking it, say "Mmmmm, this is good, thanks for the suggestion!" and walk away from that girl, seeing her face in utter confusion.
21. Taking a bubble bath using bubble gum.
22. Flashing the Cops while yelling "Oink Oink!"
23. Taking 2 Viagra Before Going Out to a Bar
24. Yelling "L'Chiem!" Before the Couple Finish their Vows at a Wedding.
25. Eating Soup with a Fork.
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