Summer Movie Preview

Since it's already June 17, I decided I might as well through in my usual movie column to help you out this summer on what you should be seeing. So take a break from laying by the pool and loitering around the fair, or whatever you kids do nowadays, and get to the theater. Here are 6 Must-See Summer Movies. WARNING: Missing any of these movies will result in loss of your manhood. Or, if your a woman, your sex drive. Also, those found with ticket stubs for "The Love Guru" will be sentenced to death by drawn and quartering. That is all.

6. Step Brothers
Release Date: July 25th, 2008
Why You Should See It: After branching out from the disastrous sports movies, we'll give Farrell one last chance. I'm not quite sure how I feel about the trailer but I have to think that John C Reilly and Farrell will work together better in this than in Talladega Nights. With Anchorman 2 confirmed to be in the works, Farrell needs a hit before it that could help not only the revenue for upcoming movies, but his career, which is dire need of a hit. He does have a few comedies to contend with though, so we'll see.
Trailer:


5. Tropic Thunder
Release Date: August 15, 2008
Why You Should See It? Because you have Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Robert Downey Jr., and a few other stars with smaller roles, all paired together. The premise is basically all these guys are actors and doing a terrible job with their current war movie project, so the director puts them in a real war zone which the actors are completely unaware of. Plus, Downey Jr. plays a black man and, with the R rating this film has received, is bound to strike comedic gold. From the trailer, I'm not sure how they could screw this one up. But Stiller and Black need it, bad.
Trailer:


4. WALL-E
Release Date: June 27th, 2008
Why You Should See It? I know what your thinking: "Mike, this is an animated kids movie." Well, fuck you. The buzz around this one is that its the best Pixar offering yet, even better than the gems Finding Nemo and Ratatoille. From the looks of the trailer, it looks pretty damn good. The new age of animated movies are for everyone, not just kids anymore. Pixar has set the bar and its time for you to get in the game and reserve your seat. Besides, are you going to go see that new Will Smith garbage Hancock instead? Because if you do, your a communist.
Trailer:


3. Burn After Reading
Release Date: September 12th, 2008
Why You Should See It? Have you seen No Country for Old Men? If you answered no, please report to the lethal injection line. After the epic thriller that won Best Picture, the Coen's next movie (which stars Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and John Malkovich) is a dark spy comedy. If you liked other Coen comedies such as The Big Lebowski or Fargo, then this is pretty much a guaranteed must-see. With Pitt and Clooney, along with the buzz from "No Country", this will be a pretty big moneymaker. And a pretty damn good one, at that.
Trailer:


2. Pineapple Express
Release Date: August 8th, 2008
Why You Should See It? At this point, pretty much anything Seth Rogen touches turn to gold. Just from the trailer, it already looks like his best. Along with James Franco, Rogen is a stoner on the run after witnessing a murder. Pretty much everything from the trailer screams "If this movie were a person, I'd fuck it really hard. Even if it was a guy." Franco looks like a comedic star in the making, playing an uber-stoned drug dealer. I really don't know how they could screw this one up, and I'm pretty sure they didn't. The trailer is so good, my friend wrote his senior thesis paper on it. This just might be the best comedy Rogen & Co. have released yet.
Trailer:


1. The Dark Knight
Release Date: July 18th, 2008
Why You Should See It? Are you fucking kidding me? Maybe because it looks more badass than any other movie ever made. I'm ready to give Heath Ledger an Oscar just from the trailer, which will shed his image as the "gay cowboy." After ridding the franchise of its only flaw (Katie Holmes) and adding what looks to be the best Joker character yet, along with an appearance of Two-Face, who looks extremely fucked up, the movie is shaping up to be one the biggest summer movies of all time, and one of the best. I mean, you have Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Morgan Freeman, Gary Oldman, Michael Caine, and a shitload more names and faces going at in this one. This. Looks. Epic.
Trailer:


So get out to the theaters to see all these movies and you will be guaranteed entertainment. Sorry for the shorter post this time, but I'd thought I'd give you a little extra blogging here. I'll be back with a real blog post before you know it. Until then, keep enjoying the summer, the blog, and the vast amounts of sexual energy. Adios, yo.