The Good 'Ole Days

Ahhh, sports. Is there something that better captures the essence of human competition? Could you imagine the world without sports? On its best days, sports are as pure as it gets. The sound off the bat of a Home Run, the sheer power of the slam dunk, and the eruption of a seemingly desperate European crowd as their team puts one in the back of the net. Some things aren't as pure as professional sports. Like leagues that just seem to not make sense. The Greatest Defunct Sports Leagues in Each Sport.

Baseball
The League: The Negro Leagues
Years of Service: 1920-1960 or so
What Went Wrong? God-damned people stopped being so racist. Bastards. The Negro Leagues had a great collection of future Hall of Famers and provided a great product for people who were afraid of going to Wrigley and getting hung by the ivy. Plus they awesome nicknames that blew "Three-Fingered" Brown's right out of the water. (Legend has it, Brown's nickname is not because he had 3 fingers but coined by a Vietnamese transvestite prostitute, whom he surely had to pay extra for that kinda action). During World War II, the Negro Leagues actually had more attendence than MLB. However, once players like Jackie Robinson broke the color barrier, most of the prominent players followed suit and the league couldn't sustain itself.
Notable Players: Jackie Robinson, Cool Papa Bell, Satchel Paige, Josh Gibson, Willie Mays, Hank Aaron, Smokey Joe Robinson
Here's Cool Papa:



Football
The League: The American Field League (AFL)
Years of Service: 1960-1969, although there were three others in 1926, 1936-37, and 1940-41.
What Went Wrong? Nothing really went "wrong", per se. After the 1969, the AFL merged with the NFL. Before that, the AFL has really been the only football league to really compete at all against the NFL. The AFL was also the source of scoreboards keeping track of gametime, names on the back of players jerseys, and the 2 point conversion. It also allowed for black players a chance to get on the field and exposed their true talents (black people are fast and mean). Plus, they played much flashier and exciting football than the NFL often showcasing long bombs. In the first 4 Super Bowls, it was the NFL vs. AFL, with the AFL going only 1-3. The win? A guaranteed victory from Joe Namath over the Baltimore Colts, in what is considered one of the biggest upsets in all of sports.
Notable Players: Joe Namath, George Blanda, Cookie Gilchrist, Len Dawson
Here's a clip from Super Bowl III:


Basketball
The League: American Basketball Association (ABA)
Years of Service: 1967-1976
What Went Wrong? Well, again, nothing really went wrong. After 1976, most of the league got absorbed by the NBA, except for a few teams that were disbanded. The ABA had a wide-open, flashy style of play that distinguished it from the NBA. There was a 30-second shot clock, as well as the three-point shot introduced in 1968, 11 years before the NBA. The slam dunk was also popularized by the league, which held the first dunk contests well before the NBA did. Also, the red-white-blue ball used by the ABA was presumably a stand against the blood in Vietnam (red), blankness of a plan (white), and what the blue-green colorblind owner of the league thought the color of money was (blue). Or the colors of the American flag. You decide.
Notable Players: Moses Malone, Julius Erving, George Garvin, Rick Barry, Larry Brown, and David Thompson
Here's part of the 1976 ABA Slam Dunk Contest:


Hockey
The League: World Hockey Association (WHA)
Years of Service: 1972-1979
What Went Wrong? Money. The WHA attempted to capitalize by placing teams in major cities that didn't have NHL teams. The quality of play was less, as the WHA basically featured NHL "rejects" or players with low playing time. However, one of the major breakthroughs of the WHA was the introduction of European players into the day, which make up a good of the NHL nowadays. However, the WHA couldn't compete with the NHL. They signed big-named players past their prime to large contracts and paid some big name signings not to play because they were so bad. It was more successful than I am leading on here, though. The league lost money and due to financial collapse, a few agreed to be incorporated into the NHL. However, they dissolved the teams and had an expansion draft with the teams, giving them virtually no chance of succeeding early on.
Notable Players: Gordie Howe, Mark Messier, Wayne Gretzky, Bobby Hull, Bernie Parent
Here's (what else?) a large hockey brawl:


Soccer
The League: North American Soccer League (NASL)
Years of Service: 1968-1984
What Went Wrong? Soccer in America. Even though the New York Cosmos were able to draw around 40,000 fans a game and 75,000 in their championship win, the entire league was never able to average above 15,000 fans. The league counted down instead of up to 90 minutes, had different offside rules, and shootouts for draws. Its image was not helped by the amount of foreign players in the league, even though it improved play, because fans were not familiar with any names of the players and didn't like the Americans having to sit on the bench. Overexpansion was also a problem and teams spending money try to match the Cosmos had with Pele are all cited as problems that led to the league's eventual demise. It did popularize soccer among American players, but fans of the game and a lack of enthusiasm and understanding have always been a problem in "Americanizing" soccer.
Notable Players: Pele, Giorgio Chinaglia, Frank Worthington, Giuseppe Wilson, Eusebio, Carlos Alberto, George Best
Here's soccer legend George Best scoring perhaps the best goal of his career and yes, that is Cubs radio announcer Pat Hughes announcing the game:


Hope you enjoyed by excellent sports column. I sure do love writing about sports. I'd imagine I'll give you readers a few more posts in the next week, as I don't have much to do here in near-empty Kirksville, Missouri. So enjoy some sports, go out to Wrigley, have a few Old Styles, and enjoy sports at their finest. I'm gonna get in a plug here for the Champions League Final played by the two best English football teams, Chelsea and Manchester United on this Wednesday at 1:30pm on ESPN2. It should be a doozy. In honor of the great Andriy Shevchenko, who likely will be playing his last game in England for Chelsea (who will destroy ManU or I will break something) this week, here's a little compilation of him.